Hilarious (maybe NSFW)

Maybe I should start watching the news. This is one of the funniest things I've seen in a long time. This may not be safe for your children.


I think the fact that he goes on to sexually harrass his co-anchor really makes this even funnier.

8 years...

The rainy weather seems right, the longer than normal commute seems appropriate. Nothing about this day should really be easy.

Who's a bigger villian?

That answer is obvious-- it's the Oriole Bird (but that only applies to my former niece/goddaughter. We have to get to a Phillies game to show her the best mascot in all of sports). Jayson Stark has a pretty good article about his opinion of Pete Rose's chances of entering the National Baseball Hall of Fame and Museum. Earlier tonight, I caught an episode of 60 minutes on ESPN Classic regarding Pete Rose. All of this talking about Pete Rose, got me thinking-- who is the bigger villian?

Is it the guy who has the most career hits all-time? Or is it maybe the guy who has most career homeruns? Was it a former Red and Phillie who owns a highly coveted and nearly impossible to break record? Or was it a current Yankee? A former Yankee? Maybe it was even a really bad backup catcher. Heck, it's very possible it was a favorite player of mine.

Who did the game more wrong? Who made a history of statistics and sabermetrics worthless? It wasn't the guy who played harder than at least 17 other people when he took the field. He didn't hurt the game any. He certainly hurt himself. Then he lied; for many years he continued his lie. There's no doubt in my mind that Peter Edward Rose, Sr. is a complete fool. But that's not because he made an illegal bet on a game as he was a manager. It's because his ego got in the way. He thought he was bigger than the game (sounds a lot like most of the links above).

It's my opinion that the player with the most career hits ever should be a member of the club of the that honors the best players ever to play that game. It is also my opinion the player with the most career homeruns should NOT be in that club. Why? I'm so glad you asked.

Pete Rose is banned from the HoF because he bet on baseball games in which the team he was managing played. That broke a rule. Barry Bonds took steriods-- sure he never admitted it, but it took Rose 14 years to admit what he had done (I'll see you in 2021, Barry.) Bonds never broke a rule of baseball. So what?! He disgraced the game, just like Bart Giamatti said Pete Rose did. Pete Rose didn't cheat as a player. Every player who's taken PEDs cheated.

So if you ask me who is the bigger villian, it's not a guy who broke the rules-- it's each and every player who used a substance (even if it wan't illegal) that caused them to enhance their already amazing abilities on the baseball field. They've not only cheated the game, they've cheated the fans. They've cheated the record books. They've cheated themselves.

Maybe the question that needed to be asked is who loses out the most because of Pete Rose's actions? Again, the answer is not Pete Rose. I feel it was all the players who were not able to learn from the great baseball mind of Pete Rose. It's the players that didn't get to have Pete Rose as a hitting coach or a manager that truly lose out. Heck, you might say it's been the Reds organization that loses out the most.

Pete Rose screwed himself by breaking a rule. However, it's a tradgedy the most prolific hitter ever to play the game isn't in a museum that celebrates individual's accomplishments of those who haven't disgraced the game on the field.

Pete Rose belongs in the Hall of Fame. Any writer who doesn't vote him in should lose their chance to vote. Mike Lupica was right, the Hall of Fame is not the Vatican. The Hall of Fame is a celebration of the best players the game has seen. At least when they are clean. It's time to acknowledge Pete Rose for what he did on the field. It's time to let him back into the game so he can teach what he knows to tomorrow's players. And it's time my niece realizes that she's too young to determine what team she is rooting for.

My Heart Broke a Little

Mrs. That Guy was doing some back to school shopping tonight so it was Daddy and Daughter night and we took a trip to Hersheypark. Despite the rain, we had a great time until the ride home. That's when my daughter said the six words that truly broke my heart. The short but biting phrase uttered by my very astute two year old was, "Daddy, I don't like the Phillies."

Now, I have to take you back to July of 2006. That's when Mrs. That Guy and I found out we were having a baby. It was decided very quickly that our baby was going to be a Phillies fan like her dad. Mrs. That Guy is an Orioles fan (mostly thanks to her college years spent in Baltimore and to be honest I even root for the Birds when they aren't playing the Fightins). So before our daughter's little brain was even fully developed a deal was struck. I gave up my rights for her to be an Eagles fan and Mrs. That Guy gave up on her chance to have a little Orioles cheerleader. Since the NFL pretty much blows and I am lucky if I watch more than a quarter the whole season, I figured I really got the good end of the deal.

The little one really seemed to enjoy being a Phillies fan (after birth, that is). Even though all the experts said babies shouldn't watch tv, I would let her watch an inning or so and she would love it. This past October, her favorite phrase was "Let's go Phillies!"

Ok now more recent history. This past Sunday we took my father-in-law to an Orioles game as a belated father's day gift. It was a great day. Mrs. That Guy, This Guy and Mrs. This Guy, This and That Guy's parents and That Guy's mother and sister-in-law all were there. Even after nearly 15 years, Camden Yards is a great place to watch a game and despite the heat we all had a great time. I "allowed" the little one to wear Orioles gear and she was really getting into the game. You have never seen anything more cute than when a two year old yells charge right on cue.

So finally back to tonight. As we drive home, I suggest that we listen to the Phillies on the radio. And the answer was, "Daddy, I don't like the Phillies. I want to hear the Orioles."

Well, my heart dropped quicker than a Brad Lidge slider. My dreams of a lifetime of suffering along with my daughter (last year as the obvious exception)as a Phils fan was "out of here". How could I let this happen? It was just too cute when she said, "Go O's!". How could I have known that one day at an O's game would change two and a half years of hard work? I mean, I was sad when a 6 year old This Guy spent one summer as a Giants fan (Yeah I know. One can only wonder why that happened) but this was totally different. My mind started racing as to how to change her mind. My first response was saying what I always say to her when she does something that dissapoints me, "Daddy is very sad that you don't like the Phillies," I said. Her response, "You're right daddy. I like the Phillies."

Phew, if only I knew it was that easy. I wonder if that will work when she is 16?

So for now our family is back to normal and all is right as the pennant race gets underway. Let's go Phillies!

Thank you, Mr. Watson

For 72 holes he did the seemingly impossible. I sure hope no one remembers holes 73 through 76. It doesn't even matter that he didn't win. Even as amazing as that would have been, what Tom Watson did do was incredible.

Sure, there have been surprises in golf tournaments-- see just last year's Open Championship and Greg Norman, but Tom Watson didn't fallback after 36 holes, or even after 54. He was tied for the lead after 72 holes of golf on a course where he won 32 years ago! You read that correctly-- 32 years. Tom Watson had won 3 British Opens before ThisGuy was even born and won a fourth just a couple months after my birthday. And after 72 holes of golf he stood atop the leaderboard looking for his record-tieing 6th Open Championship title and first victory on the PGA tour in 11 years.

Most of you know how it ended. Maybe it was his 59 year old body, or maybe it was destined to be an eight foot putt that would take him down--heck, maybe it was just supposed to be Stewart Cink's year. None of that matters, because all weekend long Tom Watson was once again the best player in the world.

I don't care that he lost. I'm not sure I've ever been nervous to watch golf on TV. My heart was pounding when he put his 8-iron over the green...as he pounded the putt 8 feet by the hole...as he hit his penultimate putt like I've done so many times. It was his consistent display of skills that brought back the magic to the game.

There was no Phil. Tiger was gone early. The early leaders faded away, but Mr. Watson stayed there. Hitting drive after drive straight down the middle of the fairway. He was consistent, he was accurate, he was simply good.

But what I liked the most was that you couldn't tell if he had just hit the shot of his life, or if he'd shanked one off the toe of his club. Compare his reactions on the playoff (where he couldn't make a shot to save his life) to those of Tiger the two days he actually played. Some are saying Tiger is the greatest golfer ever, I say he has a lot of growing up to do. The great thing is, all he has to do is study Tom Watson.

Watson might not have lifted the claret jug for the 6th time, but he reminded us all why golf is such a great game, and we should all say thank you.

Just some random political thoughts...

To everyone to the left of the spectrum of ThisGuy politically~

Your ideas are good ideas. They make sense, they're wonderful. I can't say they're bad ideas or that the ideas are stupid. I hope I never make an argument where I don't mention that your idea is a good one. Chances are they're not.*

Your problem and why you're simply wrong-- your ideas won't work, EVER. It's not ever going to work, it never has worked. Ask the USSR--oh wait, you can't. I just hope you learn that sooner rather than later.

The biggest problem I have with your president (I can say that because I didn't vote for him-- sure he's still my president, but when we disagree I can blame it on you for voting for him) is that the people who elected him didn't actually vote for him. They voted against what was previously there. Sure, there were plenty of people who wanted to vote for him, but it certainly wasn't because of his political views.

You can think of it as a baseball team who fires a manager because he's too much of a hard ass. The players start complaining, the fans start complaining and the next thing you know the next manager hired is a player's manager-- the exact opposite of the hard ass. It rarely works out. I say rarely because many of you know that's exactly what the Phillies did following the firing of Larry Bowa. I would like to remind you that it was Charlie Manuel last season who was second in the league in ejections.

Anyway, all I'm saying is that This Guy thinks your ideas (whether it be universal health care, a house for all the homeless, world peace, or communism) are good in theory. This Guy also thinks you are a fool if you think any of them can ever be accomplished without hurting the people who matter most.

*This Guy reserves the right to call your idea or you stupid should he deem it necessary.

Sorry for all the sad posts...

This one isn't any happier.

Two months ago today, a very good friend of mine was murdered. I haven't written about it because I didn't know how exactly to say the right things. I still don't and the truth is, whatever I say won't bring him back.

Daniel Coverston was 22 years old. He stood by me on my wedding day and I was proud to have him there. I met Dan through my wife, who grew up with him. They were like brother and sister. I think the toughest part about his death is expecting to see him the next time and not totally realizing there won't be a next time.

We know why Paul Harvey died-- he was old. We know why Harry Kalas died-- he had a bad heart, and had lived a full life. We may never know why Daniel was killed. There are rumors and theories and speculation. The truth is, we'll probably never find out. That just makes it harder.

Anyone who knew Daniel, knew him as someone who couldn't sit still-- EVER. Most of you know that I detest the sport of soccer. There was no more perfect fit for a sport than soccer for Daniel. He could run around as much as he needed. I spent a lot of time with Dan and he was one of the most genuine kids I've ever known. He wore his emotions on his sleeve and told you straight out how he felt.

While words seem to escape me, I just wanted to say I miss him. I can only imagine that God called him way too early so he could run around up there and play soccer because he needed more time to get all that energy out of his system.

We miss you, Dan. Until it's our time, watch over us and put one more in the Upper V just for me.

"Outta here!"

Every Phillies game I've ever listened to on the radio was called by the same guy, Harry Kalas. The next one won't be.

Harry passed away this afternoon at the age of 73. Never again will we hear the dolcent tones of Mr. Kalas. There will be no more, "Michael Jack Schmidt"s, "Mickey Morandini"s, "Ricky Botalico time", or "Pat Burrell"s.

For 38 seasons, and the only 2 world championships in their team history, Harry called nearly every game the Phillies played. The only days he missed were for the enshrinement in the Hall of Fame of his best friend, Richie Ashburn, and his own enshrinement. I never met Harry Kalas, but I feel as if I've lost a friend. The friend who told me stories of Greg Luzinski and Garry Maddux home runs and Steve Carlton and Tommy Greene no-hitters. I didn't get to hear the game today without Harry behind the microphone, and that may be a good thing. In my head Shane Victorino, Raul Ibanez, and Ryan Howards homeruns still got that familiar, "swing and a long drive, watch that baby, way out of here!" call that I've heard every summer I've ever known.

I know that the season will go on, and the Phillies will continue to hit homeruns, they may even win some games. This season just won't be like any other. The Phillies aren't the same Phillies without Harry. To me, baseball won't ever be either. Maybe he didn't call a game on the radio the way the experts would like, but you certainly knew he was calling the game-- you just may have had to wait a couple of seconds to get the count.

Twelve years ago, Harry lost his best friend. I can imagine the stories they are sharing together up in heaven. Chances are Harry is asking Whitey if J-Roll should be bunting more, and Whitey probably replies that the game is easy. And then they'll wish some Phillies fan a happy birthday.

The game is easy, but it will never be the same.

Not Such a Good Day

A very fitting tribute to the legend that was Paul Harvey. Not many people our age knew his name or even knew his voice. But for those of us who had the honor of listening, our lives will forever be touched by what I felt was true feeling and a belief that he loved what he did everyday.

It amazes me that the thousands of broadcasters that came after him, none truly understood how he became so popular. While many tried to sound the same, Mr. Harvey proved that the best broadcasters had a delivery that is all their own.

You will be missed, Mr. Harvey. Good day!

Stand by for News...

America has lost a hall-of-famer, a pioneer, a broadcasting legend. Paul Harvey was more than just a voice on the radio. He didn't redefine the way news was given on the radio, he defined it. For over 50 years, the staccato delivery graced the airwaves across the nation. At the age of 82 in the year 2000, Mr. Harvey signed a 10 year contract. That contract was worth $100 million.

It's amazing to believe that someone could do the same thing everyday for 50 years. It's even more amazing that it could be done so well. This Guy and That Guy have had the opportunity to sit behind the microphone and deliver the "news". I can't speak for him, but I know I only wish I had the ability to delivery it as well as Mr. Harvey did.

It wasn't so much what he said, or even how he said it. It was his ability to not say something (what people in the business call dead-air) and keep the audience's attention. He once described it as letting the audience listen and not just hear his news. He had many trademark statements, but he started each news broadcast with, "Good morning Americans..." for the next 4 or 15 minutes he delivered the news he wanted to. It wasn't always the same news as other networks or broadcasters, but it was always the same format.

Mr. Harvey, I just want to say thank you for all you did for the industry. Thank you for painting pictures with your typewriter. "For what it's worth..." my day was better after "standing by for news."

That's Not What I Said...

That Guy just wasn't listeni-- er reading-- carefully enough. I said I could be happy with watching only three hours of television a week, I never said I would be watching only three hours of TV. Afterall, how then could I watch the two shows he mentioned (which I do, and I enjoy). Also, there are these shows that get an honorable mention:

• ER-- I know, I know it's 14 seasons old, but there's just something about the last season of a show that you need to see


• Chuck---- need I say more? (It's ok, Mrs. This Guy knows why I watch.)
• Seinfeld-- I know it's been off the air for awhile now, it's still good. Catch up if you didn't watch it when it was on

Did I mention LOST? oh yeah, I did.

Those of you that are smart out there will notice that there is a problem with my tv viewing schedule. First one to figure it out in the comments gets -- something. HINT-- My DVR only has two tuners.

Maybe You Should Just Tell Me What TV Show You Want to Watch

First things first. Welcome home (oddly enough I think that used to be an ABC tv network slogan). Our readers have missed your quick wit and thoughtful insight on the absolutely mundane. That may not sound like a compliment, but it is.

Secondly, please accept my apologies for the lack of links and pictures, but I am doing another remote blog today. Don't want to overextend the Girl Scout resources.

Now that is taken care of... the task at hand. I am in complete agreement on the news thing. This is coming from a guy who LIVED the news business for nearly 10 years. I just couldn't understand how people could get by without watching the news.

Well, apparently the tree in front of me was so big that I couldn't see that huge forest that was burning down (forest fires... Great video, very little impact on human lives. Sorry people in Australia, but 9 times out of 10 that fire doesn't affect anyone). Anyway, there was that one day (Mrs. That Guy basically got fired in said business) and I finally ran into that tree and suddenly I could see the whole forest. And man did that forest suck. Boring, consultant drivel that didn't matter to anyone. It wasn't the stuff of Walter Kronkite, hell, it wasn't even the stuff of Geraldo Rivera and it wasn't worth watching.

Ok, now that rant is over we can move on. The goal of 3 hours of TV a week is commendable. Especially from a guy that confessed just months ago that he watched closer to 20 hours a week.

I wholeheartedly agree with most of This Guy's list. I have never gotten into Friday Night Lights, but I do see that it is a good show.

Watched an episode of The Big Bang Theory last night (a certain news conference pre-empted our other shows). I found myself laughing out loud quite a few times.

The other two don't need any explanation. Two great shows, even if they are on two different levels.

Now, I am requesting that This Guy add just two more hours of viewing a week. You'll life will be more enriched, if you do.

1. House - I can't believe that a guy who is sarcastic and cynical doesn't like this show. House is the best character on television. Period. Although the storylines have gone a bit overboard this season, Hugh Laurey's genius helps this show stand on it's own.

2. Top Chef - I still don't know why I like this show so much (yes, it's a reality show, but a very well done one). It's just plain entertaining. Tom Collichio is great as a judge/host.

Honorable Mentions: Just in case you get snowed in and have nothing to do.

1. Hell's Kitchen - I know, I know a bad reality show, but Gordon Ramsey's comments are just too funny to pass up.

2. Entourage - I know This Guy doesn't have the HBO, but watch this show on DVD someday. Great writing, great chemistry with the cast and Jeremy Piven is genius.

So there you go. Five hours of TV a week ain't bad. It still gives you plenty of time to "figure" out your number one show. And as Tom Snyder used to say, "Fire up a colortini, sit back, relax, and watch the pictures, now, as they fly through the air."

Why I don't watch the news...

...and other various random thoughts.

There are many reasons why I don't watch the news. For some reason I felt you all wanted to know what they were:

• I went to college and studied electronic media. To those of you who don't know what that means, it's basically TV news. In other words, how to produce TV news. I guess it's kinda like working at McDonald's and eating there everyday. Don't wanna do it.


• I'm tired of the same story all the time-- see our fearless leader and the 100 old people trying to pass a "stimulus" package.


• Of course Michael Phelps smokes marijuana. Have you ever looked at a picture of him?
• Guess what, there was a fire and a shooting overnight.

Okay, that's enough about why I don't watch the news. On to other (some would dare say) important things.

So, a little while ago, I wrote about watching a whole lot of TV. I have now decided that the television industry has gone down the toilet. When ABC cancelled Pushing Daisies and Eli Stone (two of the best tv shows on the networks-- I don't have HBO or Showtime, so I can't speak for them) I admit, I was a little sad. Replacing quality programming with reality shows is one thing, but when they're crap and more crap, that's rediculous.

I have decided I could get by on watching only 3 hours of television a week. I won't only be watching 3 hours of tv a week, but I could and still be happy. Can you name those three hours? I'll give you a hint, it's 4 shows. They span three networks. Ok, I know you want to know so here they are in a famous ThisandThat countdown:

4. NBC 9 PM- Friday Night-- Friday Night Lights - many of you aren't watching it. You should be! It's fabulously written, and performed better than any other show on TV (yes, that includes #1 with a few exceptions). As a whole the acting is amazing.

3. CBS 8 PM- Mondays-- The Big Bang Theory- Hilarious! Social awkwardness is funny (unless it's a part of your job), and a big helping of Kaley Cuoco isn't bad either.

2. CBS 8:30 PM- Mondays-- How I Met Your Mother-- Suit up and watch it. Major-- Major-- laughs each and every episode, wait for it...AWESOME.

1. ABC 9 PM- Wednesdays-- LOST-- Speaking of AWESOME. If you're not watching-- you're missing out on the single most influential television show, EVER. Yeah, I said it. Michael Emerson is the exception I was talking about up there in #4. Ben Linus is one of the most intriguing characters ever to grace the small screen. Go and watch the first 4 seasons then catch up with season 5, because next year's final season is going to be AMAZING.

Next week, I'll tak about the shows that could have made this list. I had other things I was thinking of blogging about, but talking about LOST has made me want to go theory hunting the rest of the evening!

Gadgets and Gambling... a Perfect Pair

It's the time of the year that yours truly and This Guy wish we were in Las Vegas. No, not for the gambling, drinking, and topless girl show at the Riviera. Right now in Vegas is the show of shows. The creme de la creme of trade shows. The glorious buffet of delight for gadget geeks. CES is happening right now in Sin City. For those that don't know, CES stands for Consumer Electronics Show. It's where companies show off the latest and greatest tv's, cell phones, computers, and other great gadgets for consumers. Most of the stuff isn't yet available to the public. Just think of it as 1.7 million square feet of the most kickass cool stuff you have ever seen.

Someday, This and That in the Morning will broadcast (I mean blog) from there live. But until then we have to rely on others to do the covering. www.engadget.com does a nice job. So does cnet and a host of other sites.

Here's just a glimpse of what I've read about so far:

-a 1080p OLED TV that is less than a milimeter thick. That's the size of a credit card, people.
-TV's that have Wi-Fi built in to automatically display Internet.
-how about a scanner that scans in 3D objects.
-Speaking of 3D, there are several manufacturers demoing those no-glasses 3D TV's.
-plus a ton of way other cool stuff
(Normally I would link to all this stuff, but I am doing a remote post from my phone, so as not to use company equipment... Never mind the company time)

So there you have it. Rumor has that This and That Guy's dad used to attend these shows. So we'll just have to follow in his footsteps. Oh, and I'm sure we can squeeze in a little time for th drinking and gambling. Probably not the topless girls, though... our wives may be reading.

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Sent from my Blackberry Wireless

The Pictures Are All Around Me

Before we get too depressed about the next 1,154 days (and since This Guy is out of town mingling with high level dignataries) let's get to something that I truly can't even wrap my feeble little brain around.

In two days, the NFL will broadcast a LIVE football game in High Definition 3D. Yeah, you read that right... Think Jaws 3 meets Ron Jaworski. Now, the game is only being broadcast to a few movie theaters in Boston, LA, and New York. And, yes you still have to wear those dorky glasses. Apparently, this is old technology. The NBA broadcast its All Star game in 3D HD last July. Where the hell was I? Not worrying about what the NBA was doing, that's for sure.

To even top this.... Phillips is ready to ship a 3D HD tv that doesn't require dorky glasses. It sends a different picture to you right eye than it does to your left eye. Don't think about that one too long or your brain might implode. The set will only set you back $25,000. This is coming from a guy that can't afford a 300 dollar HDTV this year.

Just think of the possibilities...the porn industry must be getting very excited (pardon the pun).

Day after Thanksgiving?

So on this day after Thanksgiving, a day of-- yeah, you guessed it-- giving thanks, I wonder what in the world is next? I won't bother you with all that I'm thankful for-- it's just the usual stuff everyone else says anyway.

All the experts say the economy is in the tank. We've (and by we, I in no way mean me, myself, or I, but the American electorate) have elected a modern day Robinhood (sorry, but I'd rather have Kevin Costner in that role, not POTUS). I do wish BO the best. Afterall, it's the lives of 300+ million people that he has in his hands, basically. He, in my opinion, can't bring prosperity to all of us, but he can certainly put us all in the perverbial toilet. That is not my wish, I do not want to say, I told you so. I can't help but fear that in 1,514 days that is exactly what will happen.

In the meantime, all we can do is go about living. I am told that shopping early this morning was just as busy last year. That's a good thing. My Christmas won't be much different than any from the past (other than traveling to see a new nephew). I guess what I'm trying to say is I'm thankful that things haven't changed that much for me. Maybe that is a little different than everybody else.

America Decides '08

What is ahead of us, no one knows. Why take chances with a community organizer? Especially since that community organizer is at the very least a socialist, who wishes to spread the wealth to those who don't even pay taxes now. 34% of Americans don't pay federal income taxes, yet Obama wants to give them a tax rebate (he includes them in the 95% of Americans he's giving a tax credit to). How is that fair? They don't do enough work to pay taxes, yet they get money. That's your money. That's my money.

There are many that need to realize that when the founders wrote, "...all men are created equal..." that phrase is up to interpretation. I happen to intrepret it to, all men are created equal. There has been too much insistance that everyone is equal. If I do more work and work harder than you, we're no longer equal. People who earn more money than me, deserve that money.

All I ask when you go to vote, is that you ask yourself, can I deal with myself if I allow another 9/11 to happen? Joe Biden said it would, if his running mate was elected. Can you deal with a communist as president? That's what will happen if Obama's elected. Do you want a first lady who's not proud to be an American? Do you want a president, who's spent 35 months in the Senate (20 of which he's been campaigning for president) and has never authored a piece of meaningful legislation?

It's scary to even think this is close.

Bold Prediction of America Decides '08

First, I'm not even going to touch the post directly below. I agree, but I'm not even going to touch it.



I've tried to keep this blog politics free-it's become harder and harder as election day gets closer. So, This Guy will devote only 3 posts to this election. This post is the first. It will be short and has a great chance of being wrong. Hence, that's why it's called a bold prediction.



John McCain will lose the state of Maryland by less than he loses the state of Pennsylvania.



Technically that's just crazy speak, MD is heavily African American, heavy democrat, and heavy liberal (plus is you saw SNL it's also under the heavy weight of Michigan right now). PA is a swing state, therefore it's technically 50/50. Even the bitter Pennsylvanians that cling to their religion and their guns won't be enough to give McCain the victory in PA.

How the Tampa Bay Rays Saved Bud Selig's Ass (or How the Rain May Have Washed Out a Phillies World Series Win)

Carlos Pena may be getting an extra bonus in his check next month. No, not from the Rays owners for keeping his team alive in the 2008 World Series. Mr. Pena's bonus will be coming directly from the Office of the Commisioner of Baseball. He's getting a little extra under his Christmas tree this year because he single handedly saved Bud Selig's ass.

(Full Disclaimer: I am a huge Phillies fan, obviously, so this will be slightly biased. But I am convinced that my arguments would be the same if the rain would have been falling in the other stadium... oh wait, that's not even possible... well, you get what I mean.)

The umpires, Mr. Selig (and if you believe This Guy... Mr. Murdoch) should never, ever allowed both of those teams to even start out the 6th inning. The conditions, according to Big Head and Square Face, couldn't get much worse and that was in the 4th inning. By the top of the 6th, it was truly ugly out there. Water in the infield... water in the outfield... and Cole Hamels hair finally got wet. But here's the problem... and this is a huge BUT... According to MLB rules, the game was official a half-inning before that point. That meant unless Buddy Boy stepped in, the Phillies would have been World Series Champions only winning 3 1/2 games... not the usual 4. So now that the game is tied, Mr. Selig's decision is that much more easy to take for the general baseball fan.

(Another Disclaimer: Even being a Phillies fan... and desperately wanting to remember a World Series win in my lifetime, I would give anything to have the Fightins win the World Series... but I would hesitate to see it happen on somewhat of a technicality.)

My point is that a change in the rules should have been established long before this game started. Selig should have announced that in the case of a suspended game (he does have the Weather Channel, right?), the game will not be decided unless a full 9 innings have been played. I know, that is a major rule change... but he is the Commish and this is the World Series. But that's not what happened. He made sure that the Rays batted in the top of the 6th... hoping and praying that they would tie the game (and they did it in large part due to the awful field conditions... there is no doubt in my mind that in normal weather Pat Burrell's throw gets Upton 9 times out of 10). That way his decision to suspend the game wouldn't look too bad. This game should have been suspended after 5 innings with the Phillies up 2-1. Finish it up tonight, or tomorrow, or Thanksgiving Day if that's what it takes. But don't let the Rays tie it up.

In an effort to not let the weather affect the outcome of the game... Mr. Selig let the weather affect the outcome of the game. Another grand decision by the guy who has made more major changes to the game than any other Commish before him. Most of them bad.

Plus, despite the success of the Phillies bullpen, and the layoff, the Rays now have momentum in their favor with a great chance of this game going back to Tampa Bay. Which doesn't bode well for this Phillies fan.

So despite all his attempts at playing God, Mr. Selig still couldn't control the weather. But he did let the weather change the entire face of this storied Fall Classic.

2008 World Series Game 2 Live

8:00 PM Pre-Game:
Welcome to live blogging of the 2008 World Series. I'm This Guy, That Guy will join us shortly. Last night the Phillies depended on their pitching to secure a 3-2 win. Cole Hamels, Ryan Madsen, and Brad Lidge were able to overcome the worst display of hitting with RISP in the World Series EVER (0 for 13). That's not a way to start an important series.

Brett Myers takes the hill tonight, against Rays starter, James Shields. The question of the game is, which Myers shows up? Hopefully the one that wins ballgames.

8:19 PM National Anthem:
Much better, thanks.

8:32 PM Still Pre-Game:
Good God, what was wrong with the 8:22 first pitch of the LCSes? I understand FOX's need to make money, they paid a lot of money for the rights to these games, but they have the rights, why do they determine so much in regards to when games start and are played? I'm sure they make their money back. I would like to make it my initiative to have WS games start at 7:35 on weekdays and 4:30 on weekends. I don't know how to follow through with that, and I'm pretty sure I can't out spend Murdoch.

Phillies 0, Rays 0, 1 Out Top 1:
When did Jimmy Rollins turn into a worse version of Lenny Dykstra? Popping up, striking out, it's like it's 1991.

Phillies 0, Rays 0, 0 Out Bottom 1:
How about we throw some strikes?

Phillies 0, Rays 0, 0 Out Bottom 1:
Brett Myers does not have to prove Square Face right here, does he? By the way, Mrs. That Guy suggested that the newer posts go on top. Your thoughts?

Phillies 0, Rays 1, 1 Out Bottom 1:
Not a fan of blogs that do that. Sorry, if you're used to it. This way you don't ruin the end. Please limit the damage as early as possible.

Phillies 0 Rays 2, End 1:
Ok, that's why you are This Guy and I am only That Guy. Did Ryan Howard almost make another error there? Maybe Charlie should think about benching him.

I thought the same thing (about making the error, not the benching). Looks like he needs some infield work. There have already been some Square Face comments I've let slide, but I just took a look at the slow-mo of Werth's error. He just missed it, didn't take his eye off the ball.

Phillies 0, Rays 2, 1 Out Top 2:
It's the little things that win series. Rays did it in the first, will the Phillies learn to do it anytime soon?

Phillies 0, Rays 2, 2 Out, Top 2:
Would that now be 0-15 with RISP now?

Phillies 0, Rays 2, Mid 2:
No, 0-16. Great job guys. Any idea where I can find out if Shields even throws a cutter?

Phillies 0, Rays 2, Bottom 2:
What you don't trust Square Face? According to his book, he can teach baseball to Brain Surgeons. Oh, and at least Jimmy's defense is still tough. Also, I know that ball was smoked... but have you noticed that Chase's range isn't all that great to his right?

Phillies 0, Rays 2, 1 Out, Bottom 2:
Not sure about the positioning there. His range is pretty decent. It may be the first step that is a problem. What in the world happened there?? When is a strike out not a strike out? When Kerwin Danley is the umpire.

Phillies 0, Rays 2, 1 Out, Bottom 2:
Tonight's game might be even weirder than last night's game?

Phillies 0, Rays 3, End 2:
Jimmy does get around all right. Man this game is just going to be weird.

I can only imagine that wasn't good for a mitocondrian dysfunction.

That is an amazing story. How in the world are you able to play baseball with a condition like that. I mean, I realize it's not hockey or anything... but wow. Let's not let this get too far out of control.

Phillies 0, Rays 3, 1 Out, Top 3:
I think that's exactly what the Red Sox fans were saying in game 2. Wow, did Ruiz ever hit that ball hard. Was that really that hard of a play? I'm just happy they moved the runner.

Phillies 0, Rays 3 2 Out, Top 3:
O-17 with RISP and Werth is 0-8. That's just sad!

Phillies 0, Rays 3, Mid 3:
Seriously! Ok, now I'd like to see how bad it can get. Over/Under of 24. Your pick. And here's what I got about my earlier question about James Shields. I vote for the slider that's not quite right-- see Rob Nen for an explanation.

Phillies 0, Rays 3, Bottom 3:
I'll take the under just because I'm optimistic. Oh great, there's my favorite shot again. Since Square Face has been getting the brunt tonight. I'll focus on Big Head. How is it possible to just look like an ass when you are just sitting there.

Phillies 0, Rays 3, End 3:
It's kind of amazing to me that we thought the exact same thing! If I wasn't out in the web searching for what pitches James Shields throws, I would have said it first. What kind of chair did Square Face have? It had pool table fabric as it's cushions.

Phillies 0, Rays 3, Top 4:
He has a very important ass that must be as comfortable as possible.

2 for 2, that's a good start to break out of a slump. Um...a 91 mph cange up is impressive. Square Face is in rare form.

Phillies 0, Rays 3, 1 Out, Top 4:
Maybe having Milt Thompson as a hitting coach is finally catching up to the Phillies. I'm just saying... ok, ok, here we go. Need to take advantage of the crazy stuff like that. And it wasn't that great of a play... the ball was trickling.

Okay, so you win the over/under considering that was a hit. Hardly fair, since they didn't score.

Phillies 0, Rays 3, 1 Out, Top 4:
So, Ken Rosenthal basically said it... the Rays are cheaters... and Dobbs sucks.

Phillies 0, Rays 3, Mid 4:
How many times until Big Head got that right? Dobbs is struggling, those were two ugly at-bats.

Phillies 0, Rays 3, Mid 4:
Ken Rosenthal needs a nickname. Rosenthal is just too long to type all the time. I guess if we stick with the theme it would be Short Guy. I guess this isn't why the Rays don't have a drop off after their first starter. I didn't realize they had Bob Gibson in their rotation.

Phillies 0, Rays 3+ O out, Bottom 4:
Let's go with Shorty, I don't want him thinking he has privelages on this blog.

Phillies 0, Rays 4, 2 Out, Bottom 4:
Wow, Maddon is crazy... RayHawk and all. Although, I do love the squeeze. Man the Phillies are going to bet beat tonight by a matter of inches.

Phillies 0, Rays 4, End 4
Ok, okay. Um...that kind of pisses me off a little. 1-0, 2-0 maybe. I hope that fires up the Phils too. It's a lot of runs needed, considering there's a future HOFer on the mound.

Phillies 0, Rays 4, End 4:
This Guy, that's an old philosophy that doesn't exist anymore. I am a little conflicted on that one. I wouldn't steal a base in that situation, but the Phillies offense does have the potential to hang a lot of runs on the board. Got to get the runs when you can. But at the same time, it does seem a little excessive up by 3... guess that's why I blog for a living... oh wait, I don't even do that.

Phillies 0, Rays 4, 0 Outs, top 5:
I would also steal a base there. It is just an odd situation. 2 Outs up by 3 with a guy that's been on base like every time he's at the plate.
At least Rollins is on base...maybe he can cause some havoc that way.

Phillies 0, Rays 4, 1 Out, Top 5:
Run, if you're running Jimmy... guess no free tacos tonight.

Phillies 0, Rays 4, Mid 5
They may just run now. I was about to say that PhilsNation.com may have had it right earlier today, when suggesting that Victorino should have moved to the #2 hole. That was until Werth almost broke Shields' femur. Bad, bad, bad baseball (on the Phils part) Nice defensive play by a guy who can't even walk without shaking after 5 innings.

Phillies 0, Rays 4, Mid 5:
Ok, I said I was going to be optimistic (Good god, how many times is Chevy Chase going to jump in that damn pool) but I am really starting to get concerned. Now is the time to put my self in the shoes of a Rays fan. Should Square Face and Big Head be heaping a little more praise on Shields. I mean, he is unbelievable tonight and they are pretty much ignoring him.

Phillies 0, Rays 4, 1 Out, Bottom 5:
You would think they would say something. Can you imagine if Andy Pettite was throwing like this. McCarver would be practically on his knees in worship.

Phillies 0, Rays 4, 1 Out, Bottom 5:
Ok, what the hell is going on? It was a bad throw by Ruiz, but it looked like Howard didn't even move. All that damn talk about rust (and I mean A LOT of talk about rust last night) and tonight's the night that they should break out the Rust Oleum.

Phillies 0, Rays 4, End 5:
Well, you always hope for the split when you're away. I'm not saying this is over, I've watched this team plenty of times late in games this year take care of business. It's just a little frustrating that they're sucking as bad as they are. The 9 year olds I played baseball with way back when, played more solidly than this.

Phillies 0, Rays 4, Top 6:
Again, still trying to be optimistic... but I remember and I mean barely remember 25 years ago. Let's break it down for you here. Phils go to the American League park and win game 1... (by just one run with a solid pitching performance) and then they just couldn't get get a win the rest of the series. They lost game 2. 4-1, by the way. Kind of eerie... especially this close to Halloween.

Phillies 0, Rays 4, 2 Outs, Top 6:
I'm guessing Milt Thompson doesn't teach to hit the ball the other way. He may talk about it. But this team never does it. Never (At least during the playoffs). I think the Phillies hitters need to take control of the game a little. Call time, make Shields wait on them a little. And if I see one more inside fastball sitting in the catcher's mitt, with a Phillies players' arms above their head, I'm going to throw this computer through the television (upstairs so I don't ruin my nice LCD)

Phillies 0, Rays 4, 2 Outs, Top 6:
Ok, let's not let This Guy resort to violence. We need a little 2 out magic... at least Shields is out.

Phillies 0, Rays 4, Mid 6:
Okay, since no one chimed in to answer my movie quote question last night. The answer is here. I was going to give away a car, but no one wins that.

Phillies 0, Rays 4, Bottom 6:
Ok, I knew they would go there at some point. But why tonight? Why go there when the Phillies are losing and make their fans feel even more like s(*&?. Too bad about the car. I could have used that.

Phillies 0, Rays 4, Top 7:
Let's hope Maddon makes at least 1 move too many. I'm starting to dislike everything about this team, and I'm not really sure why.

Phillies 0, Rays 4, Top 7:
Gee Square Face... I thought baseball was losing African American players to hockey. Brilliant deduction as always. GREAT at bat by Ruiz.

Phillies 0, Rays 4, Top 7:
Why is Wheeler doing his best Jim Eisenreich impression? What's with the glove twitch before he pitches?

Phillies 0, Rays 4, 1 Outs, Top 7:
Whatever it is... (maybe he's applying vaseline) it seems to be working. Man, Jimmy Rollins is just bad tonight.

Phillies 0, Rays 4, 2 Outs, top 7:
U-G-L-Y. Probably wasn't a strike, but too close to take with 2 strikes.

Phillies 0, Rays 4, 2 Outs, Top 7:
That wasn't a strike either... Do you see that huge iron pipe that Howard swings on deck. Is it possible for that guy to be any bigger?

Big is a word of many meanings. Let's see if he can live up to his size.

Phillies 0, Rays 4, End 7:
Kerwin Danley definitely did not lose this game for the Phillies (they did a good enough job of that on their own), but man... he is just awful. How is it possible that you have guys like that working the biggest games of the year. That's just plain bad!

I'm not really sure that's his actual name, by the way. But yeah, it's not Kerwin's fault the Phillies are on their way to a tied series. I'm going to go out on a limb and say it's every Phillies' players fault on that one. 1 for 26 with RISP. Sounds like a team meeting is in store.

No, that's his name... and maybe this explains why he's just not good.

Phillies 0, Rays 4, 1 Out, Bottom 7:
Big Head, let it go. They are down four runs and Myers has actually looked pretty good here the last few innings. There's no rule out there that you have to use 15 different pitchers.

Phillies 0, Rays 4, End 7:
Have you noticed that Fox Trax isn't that accurate? I'm not sure the last time I've seen a double-play turned when the runner was going. Nice play.

Phillies 0, Rays 4, 1 Out, Top 8:
Fox Trax is a joke... and yes that was an amazing play. Didn't believe he even tried for second on that one. Man, this Phils line up is making the Rays pitching staff look like they are all Bob Gibsons. They're not THAT good are they?

Phillies 1, Rays 4, Mid 8:
No, they're not, as Eric Bruntlett just proved. I kind of wish Chevy Chase would just drown already. I freeze-framed the double play. He was actually out too. At least the Phils did something right tonight.

Phillies, 1, Rays 4, Bottom 8:
Please, please, please, please stop talking about the Mohawk.

Phillies 1, Rays 4, End 8:
Ok, thanks to Big Head for explaining Joe Maddon's 9=8 to me. If you would allow me the time to discuss this theory. 9 players playing hard for 9 innings equals being one of the 8 teams in the playoffs. Remember that card game we used to play when we were younger, yeah, I'm calling bullshit. Especially coming from a guy who manages a team that MUST HAVE 10 players in the line up. Retarded. Sorry to the mentally challenged, but that's how I use that word.

Phillies 1, Rays 4, Top 9:
Ok, Kerwin Danley may actually lose this game for the Phillies. Great sound work there from FOX.

Phillies 1, Rays 4, 1 Out, Top 9:
So imagine this. Instead of Jimmy Rollins, it's This Guy at bat in that situation. I stand there--on home-plate and just don't move. Ever-- until he at least talks to another umpire. This is rediculous. I hope he breaks his jaw again.

Well, a split isn't that bad. Let's hope the offense warms up in the cold weather in Philly on Saturday. Thanks again This Guy for a fun night. Sleep well.

It was my pleasure. Let's give credit to Shields, Wheeler, and Price. They were definitely lights out. From nowhere near St. Petersburg, FL the final score tonight was Tampa 4, Philadelphia 2. Thanks for reading. Goodnight.